American Freak Show: The Completely Fabricated Stories of by Willie Geist PDF

By Willie Geist

ISBN-10: 1401310524

ISBN-13: 9781401310523

“Willie Geist is one half Twain, one half Carrot best, elements Heckle, and one half Jeckle.”
—John Heilemann and Mark Halperin, authors of Game Change

“I’ve learn laminated aircraft safeguard playing cards with larger highbrow heft. Turning critical: Willie Geist is the correct man to chronicle our decidedly imperfect times."
—Brian Williams, NBC Nightly News anchor and dealing with editor

In the hilarious ny occasions bestseller American Freak Show, Geist takes the shrewdpermanent, biting commentary enjoyed via his tv viewers to new satirical extremes. The real-life characters who now hang-out our day-by-day lives are solid as stars in thoroughly made-up scenes which are frighteningly just about reality.

Geist offers us the 1st examine President Sarah Palin’s unconventional 2012 inaugural tackle, played continue to exist WWE’s Monday evening Raw. We cross contained in the ballroom for a Dean Martin–style welcome roast of Bernie Madoff upon his arrival in Hell, with Pol Pot serving as roastmaster. George W. Bush’s batting-cage-and-waterslide-themed plans for a presidential library are laid out publicly for the 1st time. And new for the paperback variation, Geist places us within the room as Jesus joins fb, with the aid of a modern day messiah named Mark Zuckerberg.

From Obama to Oprah, Afghanistan to Lohan, Snooki to the Salahis, Willie Geist spares not anyone as our host of this wild American Freak Show. You’ll snicker out loud whereas weeping for the way forward for the USA.

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Extra info for American Freak Show: The Completely Fabricated Stories of Our New National Treasures

Sample text

Die waschenden Mütter mischten sich unter die Wunderkinder. An der Küste Amerikas herrschte Mondfinsternis. Die Ziegen bereiteten sich zur Bar-Mizwah vor … Als ich aufsah, waren wir allein in der Wohnung. Um so besser. So konnten meine Frau und ich alles in Ruhe arrangieren. Eine Viertelstunde später waren wir im Besitze von zweiunddreißig Bildern in handlichem Format. Wir werden eine Galerie im Zentrum der Stadt eröffnen. 60 Unter den großen Leistungen, auf die sich unser junger Staat berufen darf, ist die größte zweifellos die, daß es bei uns kein Fernsehen gibt.

DER BEDEUTENDE MALER: (eine Krawatte prüfend) Sehr geschmackvolles Muster … DER LADENINHABER: Unsere Krawatten werden von ersten Künstlern entworfen. DER BEDEUTENDE MALER: Ja, das sieht man. Von diesen Dingen verstehe ich etwas. In gewissem Sinn könnte ich mich sogar als Fachmann bezeichnen, hehehe. DER LADENINHABER: Sie sind aus der Branche? DER BEDEUTENDE MALER: Nein, ich bin Kün VERKAUFER: (unterbricht) Kassa 1 Pfund 70, Herr Steiner! DER LADENINHABER: Besten Dank, gnädige Frau. DER BEDEUTENDE MALER: Also, wie ich sagte … DER LADENINHABER: Entschuldigen Sie die Unterbrechung.

Noch nie in unserem ganzen Leben hatten wir ein derartiges Konzentrat von Scheußlichkeit erblickt, obendrein in quadratischem Format, in neoprimitivem Stil und in Technicolor. »Wahrhaft atembeklemmend, Onkel Morris«, sagten wir. »Aber das ist ein viel zu nobles Geschenk für uns. « »Macht keine Geschichten«, begütigte Onkel Morris. « Als Onkel Morris, der Stolz der Familie meiner Frau, gegangen war, saßen wir lange vor dem in Öl geronnenen Schrecknis und schwiegen. Die ganze Tragik des jüdischen Volkes begann uns aufzudämmern.

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American Freak Show: The Completely Fabricated Stories of Our New National Treasures by Willie Geist

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